A true flash of brilliance!

Last night was the ever popular parent-teachers meeting. As is custom, we gave our Little Fella the chance to clue us in on any high jinks that may come up in conversation so we aren’t taken by surprise…

‘My Angel, NEVER, you’re deluded lady!’

Oh yes, learnt from experience on that one. Although Big Daddy’s common response on boyish mischief is usually to put his chin in his hand, look very stern and say,

‘Really? Of course. Uh huh – well I’m not surprised really…’ (mainly because he KNOWS where Little Fella gets his mischievous streak from).

So Little Fella thought for a bit and said there wasn’t really anything. In fairness though we’d had a very long conversation the night before about telling the truth and how important that is with family which has resulted in a slew of confessions…
“No, I didn’t really run around the class in a chicken suit, I was cleaning up because I was disruptive in class”
“No, I didn’t really look for my lost jumper, I went to play Football instead.”
“No, I didn’t really forget my homework, I just didn’t want to do it,”

Minor transgressions really, so I went to the school last night feeling quite positive.

Teachers were friendly. Good start. Teacher 1 started off the meeting:

T1 “Well, we wanted to start by showing you this!” she announced pushing a letter in front of us that had been written by Little Fella, “We are so proud of him, this was an excellent piece of work – a true flash of brilliance!”

Well I was about to stand up and say, “Thank you very much, that’ll do. It’s been lovely to meet you, bye now,” When T2 interjected…

T2 “So we know he’s capable of wonderful work, but he’s still very distracted and unfocused in class…”

Sorry, what? I didn’t catch that – did you say my son was brilliant? I’m sure that’s what you just said. Woo hoo, he’s a genius!
I realized at this point I was doing what seemed to be an awful lot of nodding… Focus woman…

T2 “… so what we mean to say is that we know he can do the work really well but he needs to concentrate in class…”

Yep a true genius – bored in class because he is just so good… I could hear Big Daddy interjecting a lot… phew, he’s got this one. Fantastic. Yep sounds all under control…. back in we go…

BD “… so ultimately this is nothing new, we know he can do it, he knows he can, he needs to be MADE to focus in class…”

So to conclude, on Big Daddy’s recommendation, Little Fella will now get a quiet area in the class where he can have a chance to have some quiet time to do his work. While the teachers initially thought it may be negative (like putting him in a corner), somehow the idea has such merit, they are going to try it out for a couple of other kids, make some special tables up and turn it into a positive area where kids – most importantly Little Fella of course – can get some peace to just get on with it.

We concluded the parent-teacher meeting with some lovely-to-meet-you’s and well-done-Little-Fella’s and with entire family in a good state of mind, we proceeded to get some congratulatory treats and chilled for the rest of the evening.

Now THAT’s the way to do it!

Who’s childhood is it anyway?

Occasionally you have to assess what it is really bothering you. What is that annoying itch at the back of your brain that you are not dealing with? After my ‘episode’ with Little Fella the other day, I had to take a good look at what was really upsetting me. Nothing like talking to your own mum to put it all in perspective – thanks Mum

 

I sometimes find it very difficult to separate my own childhood from my child’s. I subconsciously see what I consider to be my failings and worry that he will have the same difficulties that I had at school such as fitting in, keeping up with school work and the sinking realization that teachers are in fact out to get you. I had (and still do have) a great loving family, good home and everything I ever needed. In fact I feel a tremedous sense of guilt that I have not been giving my own child the quality of childhood that I had. In any case, for whatever reason, school for me really did suck.

School days being the best days of our lives is a rubbish concept really. I know loads of people say that they have such great times, but I really did not enjoy any aspect of school except the home time bell. I should’ve probably kept my head down after being singled out to push a sweet across the stage with my nose in my first week, or perhaps being stuck on a classroom roof and actually not being that bothered about it was a better ‘tell’ but never the less I took a while to realise that I may have possibly been a bit of a social misfit. That was when I actually focused on the world around me. To be honest it was much more fun not living in the real world so most of the time I didn’t.

However that was me and just because I didn’t like school doesn’t mean my son will hate it. In fact it is becoming quite clear to me that I am likely programming him not to like it with my negativity. I don’t mean to. I would love nothing more than for him to be permanently happy at school, but because I don’t expect this, I think that I pass my insecurities onto him when really I should be more encouraging.

So my ‘take home’ lesson is this. The next time my blood boils because Little Fella just isn’t paying attention or has forgotten again to bring his homework home; when he procrastinates instead of getting on with the task at hand or simply spends his time staring into space, I will stop and remember what it was like for me and ask who am I really getting angry at? I bet you anything that 90% of the time I will be looking inward on this one and dealing with my own latent issues first.

If a child is to keep his inborn sense of wonder, he needs the companionship of at least one adult who can share it, rediscovering with him the joy, excitement and mystery of the world we live in. – Rachel Carson.